#376 - The Sibling Situation
Join Gus Sorola, Brandon Farmahini, Aaron Marquis, and Chris Demarais as they discuss space lawyers, Aaron’s brother Lynn, road rage, and more on this week's RT Podcast! This episode originally aired on May 16, 2016.
Recorded: 2016-05-17 15:53:16
Runtime: 01:38:30 (5910.23 seconds)
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Transcript (in progress):
hello everyone welcome to come down here this week brought you by Warby Parker blue apron and Harry's 3 wonderful sponsors for one wonderful podcast that your sponsors I'm guess I'm running an errand I'm Chris and I'm good I was really concerned how we walked out here that Chris had a giant glass of tequila what are you drinking please tell me that that's not just Straight Tequila this no I did not a bottle it was bigger than me that's why I thought it was so it's likely and Redbull is it like having after that was a lot of money I'm not sure the exact mix but it's like that doesn't sound good it's not good but it was drinking like alcohol with Redbull but still I feel like kind of stupid but I don't like the taste of Rage Ezekiel and coffee would have been way weirder and greater good guess there's probably a tequila coffee drink though and then other daughter because I have a confession to make to you it was going to be great if we started with this right off the bat 4 years ago so I'll call you after and I we went out to dinner the school play song I don't believe he had some training so we went to a bar kinda down the street and then we went back to your house and started drinking some more and we'll all kind of you seriously not remember no I don't ever say or do we eat metal place on East 6th and then we went back to your house with this did happen and started you know kept drinking and then maybe remember now I started getting kind of blown up on my text you - this girl kept like badgering me it sounds like all hey hold up I need to go outside and like take this call and then I will come back in like 10 minutes later I have to go back and I come back in and over and over and over what is actually no girl I was going Warehouse without Worth Texas right now go check out my friend it's alright guys I really to throw up some more then come back she's you know by the time I got in here I got to your house and we had like maybe one drink I don't drink anymore but it was just down here I went out like 4 or 5 times how Bully are you he wants to keep up you coming and you know that he knew and asked her had to have known and liked you came in with vomit on your shirt really not crazy girl I saw this girl she's going crazy or no memory of that like 0 wow that that's your importance Brando things hurt for you I never hang out with anyone so you blew it yeah I don't even remember hanging out with you that's what little of an impression you left on me what was it we had roast she was a costly going outside should I threw up at the table like a man bushes like an asshole the truck is absolutely have a good story you believe I don't think I dreamed it was scary scary to think like maybe some of your memories aren't real well I bet that were people are telling stories that I like and they told the story multiple times and then I start putting my are you always like you'll start a story I'll be like - that's my story I told you that like 2 years ago night looks like someone tells you a story X the phenomenon you know what and I hate to say this that happens with married couples a lot I think I'm hanging around you too much if that's happening we're hanging out to way too much and I was wondering it's like I always forget if I've had a conversation with someone like I said there's like three States Army did this happen it a dream or real life and then is it really only Tuesday and then did it happen in real life and did I tell on the podcast or did I not tell on the clock Hart telephone the Pirates be like I think I told her I didn't get any like no way to have it is in you I mean that's like hours of talking I didn't know they had this happen sometimes I'll start telling Paul about the story and I'll get like 30 seconds and 45 seconds in and then after I'm done so just be like you know you know I was there for that you know that was your ex girlfriend memory the worst I feel like she's accepted that I'm not going to remember most of our relationship so you shouldn't be mad that I forgot on time I thought it meant something is that it's not that you offended me or that I was upset it's just that I don't give a fuck yeah that's way worse that being said you probably remember the sides I had with my roast beef you know what they want to say it was broccoli yes and I want to say there might have been mashed potatoes who is a better friend with the mashed potatoes Broccoli Guy throw up now so I was speaking of throwing up I visited I went on a trip the other day and I visited Ireland it was the first time I've ever been to Ireland the really cool country I was there for a very short amount of time I was like what am I going to do you know that I've only got a few hours in the country like to try to find everything I can I just walk around the city from Pub to Pub trying to drink my way around the city and I did I did my damnedest to do it how many to get to think I did 8 or 9 of them just like immediately after pretty quickly after I don't my God it was it was not it was not the smartest plan but it was a well-executed a lot of beer that we bought in Vegas that we didn't drink we also it will we haven't slept we stayed at we decide we really have to stay up all night drinking so because if we went to sleep we wouldn't wake up we have to stop drinking so we brought the beer to the airport and then we got to the point where we could not take it any further so I think like Jesus Christ just started like chugging beer here before this your Purity checkpoint love I didn't waste it Hart of Bin no it wasn't a card maybe I'll put the beer in the car while I was drinking it grocery store something it was just beer with on a car title because you can if you're there drinking at a bar like in the airport you can get your drink in a to go cup take it on the plane with you no way so there's this one bar I was like whenever I'm taking off from Vegas is one bar like I'll always stop and wait for my flight to board and other started working there and you can get like it's like you order a drink or for $2 more you can get a double which is like and if you want Wesco Capri to get on the plane so don't always order the mm whenever you get there probably that is every time I'm flying out of Vegas with the exception of that time because we never stopped drinking I never want to drink at that point I'm like I'm done drinking for like a year after Vegas you know so did you just run any fights in the island bars anything cool anything stereotypical I suppose only 1115 I'm like the dude got like a cold then the police showed up but really that's so cool though stereotype for Ireland but like you would on a 62 CL500 the Longbranch in the get kicked out of the front doors by the bartender he got kicked out and the bartender start beating with a golf club as I was walking in and I looked at it for a little bit and I was like yeah I'm still going to go in here and I want you it was awesome because the bartender was such a badass have you seen any fights like that like on the side of the road look like road rage like people get in accidents or anything like that I've never seen it in person but I saw a video earlier today of a road rage incident in China where a bus driver got mad at a car and started ramming It Off X Men eventually like he like slams car into a tree the driver of the car gets out to try to run away and the bus rolls Andover the money in the bus driver stops with the bus on top of the guy's legs and gets out it starts screaming at are cell phone cameras not helping it the same thing like these guys started kind of like yelling at each other and then there was the bystander who was like you know I don't want to get involved then went to help but want to record the whole thing and just kind of arguing as you kind of expect it and then they start breaking out into the just this bra I don't know if we have the video to look at it as a reference so yeah so the people on the truck and those guys are from the white car sales thing the guys in the white car came back and then he started like pounding each other but eventually cooler heads prevail everybody goes back to the cars and nothing more is going to happen here everything's going Jay Leno takes off its a demolition derby Style you think they're going to call the police but the car the white car actually drives off and follows the pickup truck and the police have no idea what happened with those cars they have not this has been updated it's like if you don't have a report that the police don't there any like track them down to be like well you both were dicks I don't know but there's a lot happening each other when I was right like right right yeah he is just your fishing is like a weapon or whatever so we got the Bus video here too as well do it but this is like putting the white car off the road and I don't know the run to catch up here just a few seconds yeah he's like the driver is getting out running away at this point it wasn't in the hill come up here in a second you'll see the other driver over the guy I knew about the kind of the bus is like screaming obviously I'm the driver does not help me I'm trying to say between flying or riding a bus to Mexico this is not that there should be between the hours of like 3 and 4 maybe 2 and 4 that should be chaos hours so anything goes on the road right how about like like The Purge the chaos hours I think I'll just be on Fridays and Saturdays but basically as soon as 2 a.m. hits it's chaos hours and you can do whatever on the road you just go crazy drives crazy but I think he was trying to get around like DUI stuff but I took a tour for the levels of all men are you around and do all bus on the road sure sounds like fun because if you are participating in this pic but if you happen to be a good life Fridays and Saturdays know where you're at home and your wife goes into labor during chaos I have a big fucking truck let's just for chaos hours layover character when you could you have this you can choose between car SUV spikes coming out of it in like a half hour you pick kale how to take monster truck monster truck I also help people are following up on your story Brandon he said that apparently also people been identified today in the case now criminal case since using car as a battering runs a felony and they filed a police report today that's assault with a deadly weapon I think it was in a Houston case when was it that the woman who ran over her husband 10 or 20 years ago do you know that it was assault with a deadly weapon because she killed them while the car and they're like a car as a weapon when he's like that I think if you're if you're like a boxer or MMA fighter you're considered orbit the thought really quick if you're a boxer you're considered a deadly weapon in your face because you're trained it happens like that well that's kind of unfair to because it is like you punch the opposite way please to be like armchair lawyers will find someone maybe read it but that the armchair lawyer in - right right I hate how everyone is an expert there's no there's no there's - sources and that's nice you don't listen I work for a law firm in the front office for 10 years and let me tell you this are deadly weapons I know a lot about others wrong and it's like all right now I think of everything else on Wikipedia how to find the most useful part of Wikipedia as the you read something like okay I want to find the real Source action Authority on this you click on that and assuming it doesn't 404 or redirect to something on Central doc that's where the actual value is that I got down deep like a Wikipedia hole the other night and I started reading about Hart Island in New York City and apparently it's the world's biggest Potter's field which is where they bury people who are like unknown or like were identified at the morgue or something like over a million people buried on this island and New York City and it's weird to start reading more about it like the New York Times of the sink and what it was it's like New York has New York City has a crazy laws where it within 48 hours or something like that if your body then the first thing they do is they have to offer your body to a medical school is like a cadaver and then if they pass then you're sent to the Potter's field and buried in an anonymous grave why would without a bunch of other people like hundreds of people said if your body just gets passed over as a cadaver by a medical school sometimes is that one of the buildings on it's so big like a like a 200 foot long trench we have been and are still buried they bury bodies 323 Tall Pine boxes write 3 - 75 across too deep so we don't cross to 325 across to the state ends up being $150 MN but they know their geo-tagging them they've been doing it like you know if you heard but what they did they had a great system in case someone was like hey I heard from Grandma I'm like 5 years the $200 people in this bitch so they exhume them but they have to like or if your grandma was like the bottom of the pine box at his job now that they have the prisoners get from Rikers Island only paid like $0.50 an hour so they have these prisoners working you know all day to bury these bodies in these big trenches at $0.50 an hour and you know like it's so it's so and then some assholes like trying to find his grandpa fuckboys really there's some popular like and if you don't have enough money for a funeral what they'll do New Yorkers you can check you want to City burial for your family member but they everyone you know or probably they think that it's like a cremation or something blow up but no City burial if they put you in the box and then they take you out to to Hart Island and they bury you in the big trench there should be an app for that available to the public it is will you make sure your body you know like an hour the cool descriptions of people like up Pirates of pirates track my cell phone internet Pirates I guess around Somali a right to do how do you qualify being a pirates Rob will sit on the international how far do I have to go you can do it in Texas if your in a ship stealing from other ships how far do you have to go out that you don't have without looking I should be I think if you think you could call her as a pirate if you were jump if your on one ship and you jumped I could you like take over 18 wheelers on the entertaining KS hours you can give me a road Pirates that's just the name for a car thief right exactly that's why I'm stiff but you don't just vote space to oil and all sorts of shit and people it's the people I saw the news and I think that's an interesting episode of Vice series on HBO LOL I'm watching the episode about how in recent years the incidence of piracy around like Somali and liquid was known as like this really Pirates area high Pirates Island Pirates Pirate pirates pirates has dropped significantly there because these companies have set up shop where it's like private military companies that have boats that are just filled with weapons and soldiers yeah and so when the ship leaves Dock and meets up with these boats international waters they hire soldiers and weapons rent them they said on their boats and defend them against Pirates and then just dropped the next boat or they seem that Tom Hanks movie and they understand that piracy is no laughing matter look at me look at me I am the captain now no no I don't think I mean NFL Replay like the old metal gear games and liquidy the things they always used to talk about was the rise of private military corporations and I thought you know the kid and growing up you know even several years ago I thought that's ridiculous like that ever happened now we live in a world where there are probability alongside the military in overseas and then there's boats like this to just have like private military all on them with weapons and soldiers it's like you just read them out and use them to help defend whatever it is you need to get inside you come in contact with those you know private military Farm Supply - if I had enough money could I call them will be happy to take it yeah okay government stay there or something or something like bin companies terrifying people too or just most of these companies do not want to talk on camera about it but they were able to talk to one and they outlined the procedures which is normally like intimidation and deterrence I don't want to shoot anyone here just let it be known that they are armed and you know they're willing to write a book I don't know Pirates Council they have but I mean they could see these military places for you know these private military companies for shooting them or their friends or whatever the case is I mean good night would you be concerned if when we started sending like on voice to other planets colonize and they also sent some of these soldiers would you like what's going on like what are you going to have cuz it's not a lie if it's it's not only about contacting other civilizations about you know Wildlife you may encounter oh yeah I mean if you know about that has wildlife art using people that's what I'd be suspicious like I don't think they tell people that but I'd be suspicious if they started sending like a military Envoy with like features - that has another civil you wouldn't be worried but if they sent military along with him go here they want to figure out what is a society hey buddy you get stoned all the time and I would be a space lawyer space station and be around whenever I guess International us space capsules ran into each other and stuff like that he wanted to be a space ambulance chaser I swear to God I saw a story today about how the i.s.s has successfully completed its 100,000 orbit around Earth yeah that's crazy and it's something I forget something like it was a couple of billion miles is 3 billion miles to travel to get equivalent of 10 roundtrip Journey to Mars no not really I thought it has my few years of your writing is like the milkmare for a few years until finally it's like okay it probably is coming down we got a feeling dealing with peers they say you should really try to use good space representation for there I would be freaked out if they send them out like so you're space lawyer Stoner friend brings up an interesting point if a fight breaks out on the space station between the Russian cosmonaut and American astronaut like who no one needs like what country has jurisdiction over whichever space station there in the international whatever it's whatever whoever is running the mission we wouldn't using what mods are there in no he said space station but I was like are they on at us whatever the case is my buddy he's going to pull up in his space Honda hatchback right up to the doc come in with a stylus as we like who needs a lawyer like whoever built that specific module that happened in my to get really complicated there is a I know know know what is podcast and made this because this is way too fast there is a page on Wikipedia about space jurisdictio LOL dad with the with sub categories of trade in space space marriage and the future space jurisdictio - see if my buddy wouldn't insist on all the time station lawyer now he's just a simple he works in the towers directing Air Traffic Control directing airplanes we felt like some kind of God what's a bumping them Yahoo in law school has been space so I'm going to read this bit here what am I doing this types of receive podcast is brought to you by Warby parker.com glasses should not cost as much as an iPhone prescription glasses start at $95 including prescription lenses the titanium collection starts at $145 including prescription lenses Warby Parker makes buying glasses online easy and risk-free the home try-on program allows customers to order 5 pairs of glasses to be shipped directly to them or they can try them on in the comfort of their own home and get feedback from your friends family whoever get Brian to be back I wanted to using can keep the frames for 5 days before sending them back using a prepaid return shipping label with no obligation to purchase when you place an order for prescription glasses will be in your hands within 10 business days before I've even faster than that for every pair of glasses sold Warby Parker distribute a pair of glasses to someone in need you can post your favorite pair in the comments try Warby Parker out for yourself and see how good you look Frank go to Warby parker.com /url teeth that's Warby parker.com / 40 and you could try some classes I think I have the Robinson on right now I forgot I need new glasses finally started like doing the split thing because I had the horn-rimmed kind of glasses and it split now to where it looks like I have an even larger eyebrow that's really looks bad I really like that I've got a so you're talking about you know air traffic controller job and I guess there's been I've been out of town for a few days I guess it's been a lot of rain going on in Austin Houston well I've been gone and I was outside on my way back yesterday and I was on a flight from London to Houston and hopefully they're like oh we're at we had a schedule we're going to land 30 minutes early like great that's awesome and you don't like them and you could see me know where you are in the flight and we're getting close I will come in over Arkansas heading down towards Texas looking for to be there so soon I'm going to watch Game of Thrones and then we reach a point where if they have like heading towards Houston the plane current it starts going straight South and like that's not right for the light to go out on the pull up the weather in Houston Under storms over the ocean Houston Intercontinental has been ground stop get it down here for like 10 minutes ago so we didn't tell anyone we went like halfway between New Orleans and Houston out over the gulf and started circling us like what the fuck Circle the captain comes on he's like yeah you know this thunderstorm Houston we can't land we're going to circle for a bit and you know where we're going to have to Circle for a minimum of another 30 minutes and if you will divert to New Orleans and it makes me think of the time that pilot was circling for weather and then just wasn't paying attention and they ran out of fuel and crash the plane I know the captain doesn't want to mention so we Circle to a point I could see you like the weather the storm and was moving and it was moving worst side of her was like we're doing that same thing has a circular where we're getting a rough patch and a pilot came on go see if there's anything else I don't want to go to the bathroom you don't put it back on get this pressure on here for too long there's a whole number of things that could have then we're going to do about this like in a relatively you note for school you can go up in the and the planes like kind of losing control not just completely crashed it was in control you going to be Chris doing like somersault well then if the planes going to exercise the planes going down I'm dying anymore Hilltop weather you know like there's always like that one person he's just a seatbelt guy it's the guy that refused lyrics horrible things happen there's a reason they get on the intercom saying about people when they do that normally that's a signal for the flight attendants to go and check and reminded when to put their seatbelts on there was a flight recently I think was a flight from Abu Dhabi to Indonesia that encountered such severe turbulence that it broke overhead bins spilled everything in the aisle and 9 people had to go to the hospital and got a few pictures of it I don't know if I can pull it up it's like you can see there's like things on there all the shit there's just spilled out pronounce in your suitcase Falls like Nets you know I've been through like harry' turbulence where you're like you get nervous like a but if things are breaking right or left starburst out of your suitcase so crazy the other later time of planes feel like I was told not to get coffee on planes anymore because they never clean the coffee makers because the crews have no I need to clean the coffee-maker or during my shift just let it go forever at the problem I have with it is not necessarily that the coffee on the coffee machines are dirty right the real problem is that unless it's bottled there's really no potable water on a plane that's right you're not supposed to drink the water that comes out that you wash your hands with soap and it's like the same system that feeds the coffee and the team you're getting shit coffee get coffee it's just not to put on but they have to they can't be giving you City Coffee like that lady whatever the hell they want and there's an international chaos in the skies and I haven't I haven't been getting coffee on Plants because I just want to how I don't get it because it makes me it makes me to take a dump and I don't want to get dumped on the plane is that would you do it if like a plan you're like I just need to wake up you guys going to suffer with me like what you do what you do do you have a can avoid it I was worried you should never take a dump at 1 isn't playing very good one is a bar there's no reason to take a dump at a bar what have you been doing all day that you all the bar man something another day another not work of course that's how you get out of doing stuff done before I came here there's got to be some other place that looks like there's no reason they're not be a toilet bars are like that works for me like if I go out to a bar I become stressed that I might have to take a dump a dead body like what if something happens and I need to take a dump but you still at the bar out beforehand but there's like three stories about that both involving the same price that one friend who took a dump in my friend comes out of the bar he comes and it's like hey you know how you always like to see those like you going to the toilet public toilet you're like how did you shit on the wall like you know you like how did that he was like I have to answer and it came out of my ass he was like yeah I just really had to take a dump in it like the toilet seat was so nasty and there was like like I didn't know what to you know like I just had to go so he just squatted and just like Let it Loose there's a difference between up on the floor and squatty inciden overhead vent and just let it go I wouldn't to the toilet worth it look like a hit man had been slaughtered it wasn't what is Magic cutting a shipment there was sit on the toilet there sit on the the whatever the front of the toilet is this picture is like it was I mean it was just like a bomb I wish that we could find him and ask him to like physically recreate the position the floor like he had to bin space pitched for those like JFK or so it is what it is but he had to been like a bear with me here this is the to the toilet he had to bin and that's what I meant I wish I was a reason why CSI how to go in actors like drunk friend another time we are headed back so we are at a bachelor party and this friend so it was just me and Andrew is it in New Orleans almost everyone else you didn't drive took a bus on this bus they had certain that this buddy had certain dozens of cookies space and he was the only one who really ate them like these are these are good no no it's like $4 and so it was in the other that's like an hour or something but anyway he's apparently they are friends of ours had like a cookie and they were they were out of their minds are buddy had had 13 cookies and he was sitting there like this when we got to New Orleans and we can meet there and were like we just drove it weird how we roll that's right okay well maybe go do something like a little low key for so when do we go to Bourbon Street how we got any way and we end up at the end of the movie bachelor party so we're going to the strip club right and so we're at the strip club and we're at this like you know kind of off the side room thing and that's were sitting in that room so it's kind of like a cordon off the VIP area are you guys doing just hanging out and we sell these people are friends disappear your friend disappear for awhile that's were sitting in this the section all these people walking by like the showing each other their phones and laughing and they like pointing at this thing steady stream which of these pictures so I got the one of them to see what's going on and they go you gotta go the bathroom you gotta see this guy I'm really okay so as we're walking we're kind of were like oh man no no no we go to the bathroom first of all to use the bathroom if the door's always open and the door faces the main stage so a stripper can look directly into the bath I don't have doors on strip rolls because people from doing drugs it's alright for keeping the door to the bathroom open because of the spectacle that was in there I saw all of the dancers from the stage they were just looking in the back standing in the bathroom make you feel amazing but not completely because he had a shirt pulled up like this come from the waist down and he sitting on the praying position again and just sitting there and he was and everyone's taking pictures of him as he's trying to go to the bathroom and there like the other laughing and sharing and all and we don't go in there he was causing bathroom Ruckus and if it changes name to protect the innocent just cooling off hot how to cool off what are you guys how do those pictures that end up on Reddit I wasn't covered with shit the no no no if you finish it that's all the stall door using could be in there be like hey man I'll take you like 5 bucks if you just make farting sounds with your hands you like hey man I got some money for tip and u you're still going to bed he'll take it just put that as your friend I'm sure he's not you know he doesn't have a social following no one knows drunk guy at whatever I'll just write another guy naked in Bourbon Street you know I mean it was such an honor Chris at strip club and you were Chris was so drunk that was no that was the next night okay Chris was so drunk and he got no he got so lost let her know you're coming alright well I'm moving speaking of ours is kind of you know Shane is not really change the subject but I play the most awesome game this weekend at Barber this night club in town but Barbara was with me Blaine and Barbara and we're playing this game where does a packed nightclub right we play this game where you have to touch your nose to someone's back without them noticing and I don't know if there's points or whatever but like you basically here when the people you know of course so you're dancing your face that you know your due how to do this but like it that's the game you have to see you're all competing to do that most of the crowd that you might not necessarily all the time I saw a person like that is the dumbest thing I've ever seen and then they start doing it and I had to do it it was so amazing because you just you I got obsessive with it because you touch a few of them things you have an unnatural advantage what is true I have an unnatural event so I can I got a little leeway you know like you see this thing and I can start touching backs and I started getting really into trying to care about anything else that was going on I just start going after people's backs as theirs as their dancing how many drinks someone texted me cuz I was out of town this weekend and they are like are you downtown and I was like no it's all good I just saw a bunch of your friends leaving Barbara's and they were so drunk there's this I was there I was doing this thing do anything and I tried to get this one guy but he did he moved away from me right as my nose when he started walking off to it so this bar and he has a ton of but it's long it's big and a hard place and so I was like that guy just got away from me but by that point I was so drunk I so obsessive about it that's like I gotta get up I gotta start following him through the bar yeah I know I like action crannies in there so every time you slow down to take it short surpasses the back I almost have him but then he keep going so anyway he gets to the back he finally gets to the back now he's looking at his phone and he's like getting a drink or whatever and stuff like that on my okay. I got him so I go up and I touch him just like that he doesn't notice things like that was like his buddy who I guess he was going on say anything you didn't go no no touching with this with my nose and then the guy who I touch turns around and sees his friends staring at me and we were just kind of looking at each other thanks a lot of my Saturday night and yes I was wrong it's amazing you do hate it but I thought of you everyday how many of take a dump can a reputation as like the Phantom on the nose then you'll just be like one of those bit of like weird news Trivia Live what's with this now so what's up one drug for the Nets then you take to not take a dump Imodium Modi apparently going to be like a hundred Imodium or something you can get people are getting high off of it but it's alright it's apparently someone experiment I don't know why you would experiment to take a hundred of these is - like I do you take a bunch of Imodium and play with kids yeah and it's obvious it's bad for you because it's like well no shit I wish I was the reverse I wish I was a found the laxatives just make them super high and it's just like a trade off your pants I'm reading up on this and I don't know whether to believe this or not okay so I guess people are using it to self-treat addiction to painkillers making you some people can do self treatment for withdrawal symptoms for opiate addiction yeah yeah and I guess that's what a triangle what the thing is with with like opioids and stuff like that like that you know knowing people even think of that you get constipated from that right it's like so if you're also taking Imodium are you just building a dam rupture or will how long but how long would it last like I don't I don't know I mean are you asking how long the high last for help either one of us so easily I imagine the same people who are taking 1/7 amp on the back of their ass so like maybe they're winning some how to their hive for not shedding and that because they're not shooting then put the tampon up their ass and get drunk and like maybe they got home we out we were never apart as we can we're just not in that generation what are the health risks of taking this now and not as a future attic but you just got here the health risks and so have serious side effects including breathing and heart problems and even death is nothing the crazy bail bond moment so if this is an ok on your stomach Google Hangouts but I don't like them you can always do that anybody would prefer that going out on a date and it's like oh hold on one second I gotta yeah that's that's that's not preferable in in any way what is it so you know I keep my child out of town what is it about coming home and like taking a dump on your on toilet that's just like the greatest thing in the world how much I was out of town was like I kept having unsatisfactory dumps and I came home and I was like immediately like oh yeah I feel like a prisoner anywhere else I don't know if there's something about it where you like to feel rushed and you can see it's been a half the puzzles are I feel like other boys have weird things about them like me no more room I stayed in it was like like I kept hitting my arm on the on the feet like your balls I took a dump at the airport that was like so I traveled with our friends a cancer is in a wheelchair and you know you when you when you get on it with her they board the plane first and do all that before anyone else boards because it's like you know it's a little more time-consuming whenever we are travelling in and because of the or schedule it was impossible for us to get to the airport early so we were running at the airport we get there and we're like right as they're boarding but I have to take a huge I have to go to the bathroom so they're like oh but we need to board him now and like I have to go to the bathroom so I was I had so I went to the bathroom and then it was one of those things where because of that I made like every the wheelchair like after like in the middle of everyone else getting on the plane will you feel rushed we of course because I knew I was holding up the entire couldn't you help the sack on the planet taking a dump on the plane like while it's still Parke their people to boarding I had to go to the bathroom Justin just go are you going to be quick and I like lower back and playing like you've caused a delay they should be able to say like this guy's taking a dump in the air in the airport sorry we're late but he really couldn't hold it should have a jump pack you not going in on a train and then it's just we talk about it on the off-topic podcast yeah I can't do it I don't know I'm sitting I'm set in my ways try it once experiment people's feet touch it is it I don't know counting thing to mount something we got fishing Bay were in when I get into that position yeah I haven't I just get better oh yeah I just took your life away should I just go to you know what place you gotta know what is what color was it when I was like a kid right now like 2 years ago now I mean you're like transitioning to like 3 years from the diaper - like using a toilet fix you whatever reason when I was like 4 or 3 or however old I was when I was potty trained that was that's how it on the toilet like that was like for like this Save-A-Lot yeah when I was like 4 of them like this anymore - part 2 I guess I didn't and at some point I was like on the toilet like this and my mom or dad was like you should sit on the toilet not like perch on it Like an Eagle like to try to squatty to try it for whatever reason when I was three or four this felt most natural because you're stupid let's do it this the potty thing no that's 24 legs yeah alright I'm just saying is I do think there's some like that have my back on this one Kris portable toilet for 200 years now hundred fifty years so I can say that we don't need to go back to shit in the woods posture I think we're fine how we are you know have you seen the the shooting unicorn video no I need to see the shooting unicorn video will change your perspective using Squatty Potty like an idiot Parke on this God damn where would we move beyond that we can watch it later hold hands while you while you watch it but it does make me think about like you don't have all these advances in technology and what if they're just like a very basic thing that we had for all for a long time but if our pastor is wrong sitting on the toilet now we haven't realized after all this time or it's what's causing like skin cancer to prom Orlando we're not going to fucking watch the video not saying or what if it's like oh we didn't carbonated water is really bad for you yeah they're just like some fundamental smoke and stuff and how it evolved I feel like that's one of those things that you knew yeah I always need cigarettes or not even a hundred years ago things like smoking couldn't possibly be good for you but they just marketing wins with enough money you don't like a chorus but 50 years from now or whenever let him be like I can't believe people use the same toothbrush everyday I cannot believe how disgusting how often like we do it like even if you have a fancy toothbrush or something at some point you still using the same brush every day. To be like I can't wait they weren't using the laser beam stuff I think these before they're showe you know if you keep your toothbrush out like in your bathroom that flushing a toilet eject is 30 okay yeah I guess you're right above my toilet plug with in Flushing distance the walls of just come and everything is covered up during your bathroom the flush when you flush it helps there's a lot of stuff in life that's covered in poop I hate to break it to you the realest in the city potty personal toilet every I think 5th or 6th flush some sort of thing happens where it launches water out of it like 5 feet it doesn't happen every time it probably happens at 20% of the time but when it does it gets high enough that will hit you in the face of Barbara she's been there she's been victim but like you can't control it and I try to keep the lid down a little a lot but sometimes you don't think about sometimes you're on the toilet when it happens and it just it's like a free but they but it's not the kind of the day you want it's like a boil but a son to hold think about like okay then let's just say I don't know what to do about it I will have to fix that so awful he will not fix it personally won't believe me and second of all he won't drive from Houston to fix it so I'm stuck with this random like Russian Roulette toilet that every now and then that gets me in the fucking eye with toilet water Segway I have an update i.s.s - about this time we hung out and she says definitively vaguely yes ask after her Vegas odds the lovely dinner and I bet she not only get them right I bet she knows we're there are the potatoes I know the answer but I won't say it because it's butter on Broccoli everybody that I don't know the freezer you use a microwave on everything you are I just took it and you like what like what are you doing breakfast or dinner whatever you like I am not a fan of microwave I hate using another how to trust it and I hate hurting my microwave on its like I will do anything in the world I can to not use my microwave was afraid that is going on I just don't trust it I just like I just don't I don't think it's like a natural thing and if my friend and 57 popcorn microwave popcorn air popper just my friend convinced me that you have to wait 3 seconds after it finishes cooking for you open it otherwise you'll get radiation Parke my life every time it would be and then I had to wait 3 seconds One Mississippi two Mississippi three Mississippi and then I'll open it we still do it though you people like what the fuck you doing get open like they're waiting in line using microwave you know when I'm just freezing my truck there's a line for it probably work or something outside and perched on it like preach it too I think that was part of the idea for your bin microwave light water heater weird things like that to get you to mold your behavior they told you a lie I mean that happens all the time but like oddly specific ones like my parents told me every time you flick on a light switch cost $0.19 is it every time it goes up cost $0.19 so whenever you do that way every time you did that was $0.19 you cost us $15 when he did that I don't like and I thought that she was probably 17 Tel Aviv everytime flick of the switch $0.19 not including all the power you're using a keyboard like fucking crazy and then I figured out on my own like I like bigger lights like I like studio lights Mike can I know my graduation told me that paper towels are expensive so I didn't I wouldn't use paper towel holder use without me and I don't know I guess I don't know waste paper towels are expensive and in my head I was like these are really expensive like why do people what kind of house did you grow up in the paper towels and napkins having everything I decorated and like I will be sure these are napkins that we have this and then paper towels over here and these are the fancy now he's birthday and she was just really weird about that so one point someone said don't don't don't don't waste paper towels are expensive dishes that you've never used there like dining room dishes for when we have our fancy fancy dishes that we don't see why not man I had the I had the worst the funniest text for my mom never ever read it okay alright give me a second alright this one reminded of the podcast is also brought to you by Blue Apron not all ingredients are created equal fresh high-quality ingredients taste better and are better for you so it's important to know where your food comes from Blue Apron know that when you cook with Incredible ingredients you make incredible meals so that the highest quality standards for their community of artisanal suppliers family run Farms fisheries and ranchers for their Japanese ramen noodles while caught Alaskan salmon or heirloom tomatoes Blue Apron is bringing you the best for us and $10 per meal Blue Apron delivers a seasonal recipe along with pre-portioned ingredients to make delicious home-cooked meals with blue apron customize the recipes each week based on your preferences each meal comes with a step-by-step easy to follow recipe card and proportion ingredients that can be repaired in 40 minutes or less chapter 6 manual and get your two meals free with free shipping by going to blueapron.com / rooster teeth yellow how good it feels and tastes to create incredible home cooked meals for Blue Apron so don't wait that's blue apron.com slash Rooster Teeth Blue Apron a better way to cook Nets big fan of their service use it every week that's awesome I don't understand where people learn to cook in general I can't I can't I can't boil hot dogs that's it but I don't like to do people do parents make their kids look when they're going out like how do you observing and helping isn't it a lot of it and just a general desire to want to get that other stuff to do what you're doing okay so contact for this I recently had a death in my family and then so my mom text me this randomly no contacts just did you take a shower with a guy in a video good start and I knew what she was talking about on on my personal YouTube thing I did a stupid like video of how to take a shower and there's a bit in there where I'm like it if you can there are those hard-to-reach places you might need help and then someone pops into frame behind me as if we were thinking about you as if it is just stupid joke and so I was like not actually pretend Mom that's what movies are those my response to her and then these are all other relatives that I'm listing she said this is what I assumed but Justin was a little confused said Mindy's Josh told him about it and there's some speculation that the authenticity of the video there's something to know about my children would you be a pallbearer and then it wasn't in the category of porn was it that's fantastic mom asked me if I was gay if I'd be a pallbearer for my lift death in my family and if I planned it like it's not but I was like no it was a comedy video mom is that a no to the pallbearer that's so good I'm glad I stopped you from putting out that one RT live video just leave it hanging out there that we are he said he said would leave it as one of those things to where it's like I remember in high school my mom came up to me at one point she was like you know I just wanted you know she asked she asked me if I was gay and I was like no it's not it's okay if you are I don't care I love you anyway but I just want to know like why do you why do you think I was like you never bring girls around us like that because I'm protecting them from you home to wear like I shared a room with my little brother I meant like that's not good my brother when you know you know like that you know I never brought women around either of you know to the family the families are asking him like it is there and he is not what I thought it was like I was like yeah yeah yeah and has been for a while he just scared to tell you got Isis instead they ask when I was there and found someone yet okay alright one up so fast for to come we're not show up for Thanksgiving I don't like Erin so you met anybody lately and I was like I mean old people and I was like I mean I know you go to bars to go to libraries and you know what I mean I don't know special Mars Cowboy tight ends or maybe you know maybe some Village yeah I got that sound never knew and I Thanksgiving and Christmas that I had no idea that they thought they were thinking that keep it going as it should and then I just did I don't think I've cleared it up but yeah that's great brother they're really funny rolls report that's what he says for absolutely I just thought it was so good he will validate any jumps on anytime someone asks if something is this happened it was you that without hesitation my brother does streaming with whatever and he just can't commit to a bit unlike anyone I've ever seen to wear like you will get lost in the truth so quickly and he just loves that I wish I could think of it you may know the story of Parke ass wherever your landlord was trying to show your car right right and he said his end and they could be like we could you know we can get ahold of Erin and you will see the emergency number what happened there and he's like oh yeah he's in jail and prison sorry the bus and I like it's always stuff like that the really I can't end of the thing is is I can't believe roped into this because Blaine was recently out of town and he said Aaron you know make sure Lynn doesn't break into my apartment I said dude I can't I can't promise that I am a if he's bored space of international no symbol and I was like hey we can meet a friend come into town to visit I was a kid and he's asking to crash at my place like Aaron's out of town why don't we just how was like texting and I was like hey can we can sew and so cross your place like no I don't have the key with me but at Lincoln Lincoln apro he can he can break into it has all the lock picking stuff and all that stuff I mean he can get into anything it's scary like I got locked out at the YMCA the keys in his car he went to the YMCA and he got what he did he got maybe a coat hanger or something and within 5 minutes he broke into his on cop car like I mean he's not a cop but he owns a cop car and he what everyone thinks my older brothers and a younger brother I didn't know I thought it was so interesting to me like I can see why someone would get until you don't want to break your trust so much of you should people trust all of their shit to be like secured by a lock and you think about it like I guess old technology change in maybe a hundred years right and you know on cars maybe it's a little different with locking mechanisms work with you if you just learned you know one or two things about him then there's nothing stopping you from bonded to get into anything I'm almost like having to talk about it when people discovered bump keys and if you member that like 5 years ago or so we just like he was kind of like loose teeth and you put it in a lock in your kind of like shake it or knock on it a few times and then it like falls into place with the tongue can cats have different sized bump keys and you just like knock on it a few times and you keep twisting it and eventually fall right into place and you can open up almost any lock that doesn't mean that's always always something else there's like a door the the latch connect to the door frame activity the screws are like an eighth of an inch it's going to break and even the door jamb could just like smash through to her or even even worse with exercise your window you still got Windows still affects so many ways to get into it or they can or they split your convertible top they just cut it with a razor blade like they've been there for a motorcycle they could just jump on your motorcycle and take off with it that can't leave I'm sorry I was parking my motorcycle out front and then this guy got it stings like where are they so I start parking in the garage but like we're going to die anyway for you every time he is with the equipment no more frequently than the other yeah that's enough hamburgers everyday is a choice to who Hebron - part 2 cartons of cigarettes I'm just going to smoke them all tonight but it's going to be that face looks like Aaron you know about cigarettes Barbara. Barbara was not on the motorcycle the other day in case the documents are watching but if she had been she would I know I've lost about oh Chris you cannot drive a motorcycle now the way you drive you are guaranteed to die immediately on the motorcycle there is no it will be like you've been in a Flash and you know who they turn to when that happens they go and what you knew he could you you know I know you didn't have any trouble yeah I can't find you can ride a Vespa and you really seem at home on a Vespa never try okay those are literally like foot tall they're like they're really good my thing has the and it weighs the power of 100 got the horsepower of like a Honda car the Honda Civic have an old Honda Civic anyway the bike only weighs 3 to 50 pounds so and a car weighs in at 10 times that so you do that and it's really you know that if I feel like trying to describe his penis or something it's really great and it's really blue Islan yeah it's only this big but it the power Pacific it's only this big and I can't leave it out or it'll get stolen just like a parking space when you go out yes Mother of course because I need my space but it's nice I don't have to pay for parking downtown or anything it's just the elevated risk of you know injuring myself on road with other so it's okay just parking anywhere for you can just use your motorcycle and anywhere. is right up down the hallways and just think about writing it to sit when I was on day 5 of thing about riding to set like showing up kind of late and just driving right into the middle the like I wish we had bullhorn Sweden have bull horns without him in such a Michael Bay movie that have been redone kids we lost Uber and Lyft I walk downtown Saturday cuz I was like I have no other option here and was like 35 minutes and then 35 minutes to get downtown and 15 then we went to the bar and for Blaine's birthday and I mean it I got there like all right guys we're going 10 blocks down to Barbarella smells like a mother fucker so you were talking about cars even want to think about something that I wanted to bring up this week on the podcast which is also an auction online for arguing for your car on the car for you if you are I wasn't but tell me on a 1983 Rolls Royce with custom built into a station wagon and it was modified to run on propane instead of gasoline but the only catch is that it's in Germany I'm going up for auction and they're expecting it to sell for about $29,000 so you could own a custom-built Rolls Royce look at 2:10 P green and green green get one of those tanks like at the supermarket rolls like a customer ordered it because the story is I don't know how true it is the story that you have the Rolls Royce the story is that he wanted a Rolls Royce to to his race car Brando I do I modify to run for on propane but there it is again I need an oil change to go and it's you know as soon as you have you have to spend another thirty Grand on it just as well be some vacuum hose that just explodes you want to watch it because it was custom-built right you said yes Rolls Royce that are already custom Billet and have it custom built on custom built and by who is building a time British something under that whatever that thing is going to blow up and I would totally have hasn't even looked cool now it's kind of cool it would be like hey you want to ride my Rolls Royce in the Rolls Royce behind the station Wago 14 cars in but if it's older than something like 25 years I really have to hire a company to do it yeah it was bullshit trying to import a Toyota big as a really rare car Toyota station wagon you were I called Toyota USA told me to cut Toyota candidate I told Toyota Canada the cold told me to call Toyota Mexico to the Mexico team to call to eat at such an interesting story Brando and I'm just angry I don't to go into it cuz it's fucking boring custom shit but it just makes me so angry how everybody is throwing me to another place right I'm sorry I'm done called the governor I just imported Toyota I think I wrote a story a few months ago about how governments are starting to wonder why it is that Isis has so many Toyota trucks yeah every one of them is a Toyota truck drives so that people sound like trying to start to question how are they getting Somali Toyota always a Toyota truck the Toyota and then like why is this Toyota I don't know why is it applying Isis it's a little on the how so fucking hard to import a Toyota in the United States have to go somewhere it's a story here on ABC News on the website for us counterterror officials Avast Toyota the world's largest automaker to help them determine how Isis has managed to acquire the large numbers Toyota controls prominently in the group's propaganda videos in Iraq Syria Libya closest on commercials or something the mountains Lake car company just giving them Toyota that would be just like negative propaganda endorsement cuz they run through everything it's like you know I'm here in the desert hit by NATO forces Toyota stare the Toyota guy here right now you see when they shoot those anti orbit the whole truck like lurches back it just makes sense though if they're shooting AK-47 and you know stuff like that I said stuff they're going they're going to keep going it's like you know that you're always the stuff for the Toyota Hilux which of the Toyota truck you know they dropped off buildings that you have taken a volcano's whatever but it just keeps running and if you're fighting you don't International War you gotta you gotta what did the libyans are better than butt the Toyota van was it a Volkswagen van the Volkswagen I'd like to tell blue and white yeah that's so funny remember that but they're not they're all in those vans though like a Back to the Future representative looks like I was thinking about home so I can hold you by Harry's stop compromising on your shape and get started with harry' for far too long either pay too much for a comfortable safe or your cell for a low price low quality razor harry' for something you never had before a great shave at a fair price harry' to make its own high quality Razors Cuts out the middleman and ship them directly to you for half the price of the leading brand good shape good price it's simple get the best of both with Harry's I restarted it the Truman is a great option for new customers and an amazing deal for the $15 to get a razor handle moisturizing shave cream and three of Harry's five-blade German engineered razors plus this special offer for listeners to the show I will give you $5 off your first purchase with promo code rooster go to harry' Stockholm right now look for the Truman set that's Harry s.com and enter code rooster at checkout to get $5 off and help support the showe stop compromising give harry' to try to I travel overseas with this razor cuz I like it so much to shape up or clean up my beard and what's your current facial I got I got to watch them all in here and he is the current design layout you're going with this on my face the transition of that's already been doing this for a while I mean it's only been like 9 years let me know when I used to say that but it's been like two or three years I've Done That What's the next 5 years or 3 years I don't know when I don't think your facial hair I do from time to time I just don't tell you that one short where you happen to save the day we're doing pick-ups only put mascara in short you did I think we had to write we had until May in the air but we still in this the might have been like the last time that I fully shaved her to the early the let us know he knows now I noticed now when I look at it when I get home I can look at you the scene where it's like diamonds get sticky notes with dicks or something and you're wearing mascara has a beard the coffee cup the closer you always shoot at to not show my face the shooting was terrible it's funny when you do stuff like that and people don't understand what the reason was but they noticed something different like what's wrong with Elsa's face look exactly just think it's something naturally that's something especially wrong with this face this week I don't know what I was thinking about putting a deposit on the Tesla but then Jordan convince me not to because basically you and am ready to commit to what he told me he's like well you wouldn't get it until like 6 months after like bus and I and everybody else so you come in the office really excited to talk about it and everybody would be like oh my God that's so last year longer than 6 months share this Joy with to go to Paul but she's like I don't know but he was trying to do it like the day after and I thought about it cuz I love cars that drive themselves and stuff I can't believe you didn't do that how did you not do that I just don't care about cars I didn't want to spend a bunch of money on a car but you let you want you respect what this 30 give me but I just don't like spending money on cars I like cars I don't have any money or cars is also dumb thing like ours are as a general rule like a terrible investor like she ate instantly but this one's not like a crazy amount of money and I feel like it's a car you could ideally use for a while and if you also could have gasoline it kind of like that plays into that as well and by the time it comes out my current car to be making me feel bad either over or you know Google there's get basically going to be a bit like a subscription service - self-driving car so instead of buying a car and buying Insurance you pay this much money every month and you have all the self driving car you know cab rides basically I think you're awesome and that's what you don't care about the car you just drives like they do have a car that's like you know electronic vs. like gas while I think that's cool but yeah I like all the ideas of a Tesla I just don't care about cars and I was just thinking of the subscription service aspect of it like what if you lost your credit card and they tried to charge it while you're on like a road trip and like you're in the middle would like you haven't made a payment on knowingly in like a month and he was kind of like a sleep in the car and it just like cancels your auto drives smart thing to do would be it would then detour to the closest Office please pay immediately to drive you to an ATM when you don't have any cash and the credit for this trip protection the 80 the cash 35,000 like I would personally not ever have a self-driving car but like that seems like a good price you're not going to get one of those for 20 grand and not yourself 7 Carstairs - difficult to maintain and probably program it's going to be a completely subscription service that you're able to make it out of this the first thing you said why is it too difficult to maintain you know what if you're driving and there's a bump and something moves you know it's going to be like squatty you know like your Pistons firing order spark plugs your car was like alright go at some point and get this looked at apro to component on a self-driving car stop working or is messed up tow truck in Cars overhead computers and computer issues are so rare in cars this thing is it's not just a computer issue with a computer issue relies on a physical object like they have a computer and a Beretta the case now Brandon you shouldn't have fuel injection in cars that's just another point of fishing something goes wrong on your self-driving car that is that is not something that no that is honestly to me your product and if something's wrong you take to the fucking mechanics like the car you drive now something goes wrong you take it to get it fixed there are more things as the cars 2000 if one designed the car to account for that but now it says the front right is very loose you didn't know you can pop off at any time did you know that when does that pops up first of all I'm getting louder cars that's not you're not driving by why are there elektronik I just got a call right now when you break you're not actually doing anything computer how many kids like in in when she hasn't said computers or cars are all driven through computer get the reason you don't want to drive a self-driving car is because it's controlled by a computer no not because it's controlled by a computer because that computer relies much more on physical pieces of equipment in order the think he's worried about and I'm going to try to steal his fear he's worried about the cameras and the sensors on the carburetor is that correct Brando the best are you from a safety perspective you will not get in a self-driving car know I'm just saying they're not there's more points of failure then with another car and if something fails I don't think you fuck with it the car just doesn't drive itself any more whereas in a regular car something goes wrong it's like alright you know just eventually take this in and get it looked at like if I have one little error light and a self-driving car I will go to 3 how is it going to go and stop it they're going to know they're like there's going to be some crazy ass hold as soon as you see their lights going to freak out and not just have an internal State and not freak out shut down the car stop centers that are not just like GPS satellites up all of that I'm not trying to say I'm afraid I'm cut I'm going to die what I'm saying is it's more annoying because if anything goes wrong the car becomes unusable you know there's more points of failure that the boat here how to get added to cars that have been happening over decades I'm sure people thought that every single time every single time when you pick technology comes around and gets it at 2 o'clock someone says I'm great with that new piece of technology it's broken now my car is worth less and now I can't fix it and that was like the big thing with cars went from an added fuel injection always onboard computers like no it wasn't a box in the bed of my truck on the side of the road do that anymore extension of the removal of the driver as someone who can work on the car technology to do that helps you breaks like the car will break itself if it thinks you're going to crash but if those things stopped working and I don't matter the danger and requiring on not not computers companies here in your faces but physical things on the car companies like Mercedes right for a number of years now have had a child developing their own self-driving car but they said they would sell for a lot sooner than that if you're falling asleep if you're falling asleep had a number of years now if those systems were to fail you know and thank you were asleep the car with you know warn you or shut down or whatever will those things don't feel that often yes, I believe Mercedes is selling those vehicles to Uber but I could be wrong I want to say I'm driving worried about Brandon yeah it's stupid someone else is worrying about it yeah I'm creating a solution for it I need to get that wheel bearing fixed maybe finally Brando for being here he ruined in the last five minutes I thought how was he last night. I'm really sorry for Brandon