#500 - Gavin or Google 14

Join Gus Sorola, Gavin Free, Barbara Dunkelman, Burnie Burns, and some special guests as they discuss human anatomy, things they’ve said over 500 podcasts, play Gavin or Google, and more on this week's RT Podcast!

Link: https://roosterteeth.com/episode/rooster-teeth-podcast-2018-rooster-teeth-podcast-500

Recorded: 2018-07-10 19:00:00

Runtime: 01:45:29 (6329.95 seconds)

Participants:

Keywords:

[
    "gus sorola"
    "gavin free"
    "barbara dunkelman"
    "burnie burns"
    "tyler coe"
    "mia khalifa"
    "ezra cooperstein"
    "500 podcasts"
    "anatomy"
    "human anatomy"
    "cake balls"
    "sportsball"
    "world cup"
    "england"
    "soccer"
    "cursing"
    "sugar baby"
    "massages"
    "gavin or google"
    "dunce caps"
    "school punishments"
    "typing"
]

Linkdump:

[
]

Audio:

Transcript (in progress):

you're listening to Rooster Teeth podcast number 500 if you hear something you would like to see from this episode visit roosterteeth.com we're doing something a little different little crazy live animated podcast we're podcasting the animation department is animating it live right now in real time I live I do this a jumper he look everything so much better in animation I love this it's awesome we should do every episode like this time so I guess let's start the podcast all right I'm pretty and Barbara the whole thing to the bird feeder Barbara tuck jump rough budget what type of strings I told you this is not the way animation works why is my mouth moving I don't know why is my mom watching the words moving here where's your body what do we what do we do then I don't know what you would like Barb yeah I can tell you what to do hello right before we walked out I made sure I didn't have my badge on I'm so it feels like reflux before you go live checking to make sure it was dumb enough to stick around for 500 episodes of this goddamn thing you made this 500th episode of the receipt podcast we'll talk more about them later it's too many what is like time like where do I go back to the old time oh I see what you're saying for podcasts that's good and then some 500 right podcasting this December will be 10 years for the podcast and then next April or May will be 10 years weekly cuz we were not weekly to Eric it's great having a producer on the podcast now cuz I can just be totally checked out your checked in we had a a meeting to discuss to organize her podcast 500 and Bernie Eric and I were all there and after a while just like you guys got this I got some meetings to you cuz ever like whenever I see you're in it I always walk by and you're like this Eric I think has done more producing of the podcast in 30 days then you have done in 499 episodes today Gus was literally like this the whole meeting thing hahahaha I'm leaving without we were done working I had a meeting we had to talk about like what they were going to make this RTA for podcast 500 what should we do please football too much of ideas and let's do it right now right before the podcast started backstage Gavin asked me about wanted to see my dad an impression for the whole thing but they wouldn't let me one of these I've loved working with this group for 500 podcast a lot of the faces of change we've had people come on and off but I think we've been we've been in the most consistent group I think and what are things I love about it is that we tried to have a dress rehearsal earlier and as soon as we sat down and started talking about the main stuff from the week and I love kiss backstage Barber came came up and asked ridiculously stupid question but we all treated it would like the weight of like a serious life question she comes up and just look on her face like this guess what's up what if my vagina was right here in the front like it wasn't underneath and haven't goes well let me think about that position I'm just as invested in that question than any other question like what should I wear tonight it's the same I'd like to go to be convenient with you only this what are you saying like guys only want one thing and it's disgusting when will the sun set in like doggy style or if I feel like I have the flexibility to do like downward doggy style with a yoga pose and then you still have down basically like hanging from your dick always selling this more and more how many going this direction anymore so you can use like a coin purse used to carry a bag with pockets do sucks so I heard something else entirely the vagina was the first poorly designed Woman pocket is that the fashion industry just took a cue from the vagina it said no pockets and everything honestly don't know why I started for some reason I had to pull my pants up here what if your vagina was like right there in like you have like a lowrider pants vaginas hanging out there yeah we like butt crack you have bad crack every now and then play cats are hairless kind of butts why isn't everything the same hole cuz it cuz immediately I'm thinking where should my penis be I should everything be the mouth play we have one whole one hole you want an out hole because the thing is some animals have that right you want to separate out whole I want to separate a whole as well. Do you have you as long as it bypass all the taste buds I want to taste it but I'm saying if it was like this like that like piss in it it's like the woman's urethra is separate to where the penis goes just fool around then yeah it'll be different hoes but in the same container I like you open your mouth and if you like what you see food and that right food and air separate holes can I put his stuff later taking stuff out of there. Just more to go wrong when you got five different holes especially especially when you're dating a guy who apparently bangs you in the belly button I think it's got some from a board it's just like legs in a hole I don't think there is you might be right we have a bartender right I feel compelled to ask for something for something something really complicated you have a solid knowing that every single type of alcohol in a beer handle with a plum beer can be complicated or whatever would be yes where would be a the most convenient place for a vagina to be and be the least convenient place for vagina to be list list Covina would have to be like the bottom of your foot how dirty is your foot I mean from the standings for the top of your head right in the middle of your back Chevy service back there ever been a lot of faith there have a lot of food Barbara's foot bathroom immediately is being ridiculous me while you're shitting out your mouth in the men's room stop it yes speak Shirley there's like in the crowd right now there's like one marine biologist was like a mother fucker but if they start sex position you should they have a headset I saw you look very official was very complimentary of you that you don't have it the thing what is the dress rehearsal folks dress rehearsal we had not 10 minutes before you showed up the thing with the thing on it that thing with the thing on it got it but we do have a special guest let's go and bring them out while Eric recovers why Eric made this for us this is our 500 episode cake and if everyone looks under their chair you will not find any cake because there is no way to put cake under a chair this is I love no matter how high the production value on the Russia podcast yet we still brought out the big thing in like a pizza box essentially it looks like a bee just got it from Amazon on the front porch with the really no flare should we slide off the Box damn it we're like a top hat did you ever think it was your point in your life where you present a cake to a theater full of people and they applaud you for it cuz I think that might be the stupidest thing I've ever seen and Gavin because this is a special anniversary podcast you can put that in whatever hole you want to you can just jam it in whatever you feel comfortable that's very much like her hands yeah I guess we're doing what is Dennis a four-wheeler for still even if you cut the smallest slice in the world is still a mess of sliced doesn't really a logical cake right you you you look at it she got in the gravity of the cake and got the germs out and I don't need it February 30th birthday old man when you go out and eat with a big group of people like you make a big deal about washing your hands and wash your hands before dinner and being clean and there it goes to a full meal and then they all eat off of the same dessert play set the most disgusting thing we do on a regular basis as people eat from each other's dessert plates people are too sensitive about germs in person. Tackett got in there got a big got a big scoop of it and I like that's it not a plate but it was delicious and it was wonderful. Would you prefer if they they gave one deserve it gave us nine teaspoons so that each spoonful was the difference between in the snow gems decadent in any way whatsoever and that's it I wish you would serve like a third portion of a dessert that was an option at restaurant like because that you usually entire slice of cake whatever it is Will Smith a smidge or portion of dessert it's the least cost effective way to eat a cake like $3 for a stupid cake ball it's like this much cake yeah pretty much bigger cake at HEB for like $10 I'm going to pay $3 for this thank you for someone else to get an ice cream scoop and just make cake balls that's a great idea that's and that's an amazing idea speaking of balls nothing Falls we have a show in the historical archives popular show that once it was unfortunately taken off the air it became eschewed cult favorite and everybody ask for that show to come back we recently had a teaser announcing the return of sports ball so here to Crater sportsbal Miss Tyler Co and his co-host Mia Khalifa what are you charging more what a gentleman you're welcome again no flare up here to open this up when referring to cutting a cake in the Box oh my God why would it's two cakes cake spine text line Ariel congratulations Erica 500 podcast started last week so welcome sportsbal while you had me on though you know that's not a good idea that's it everybody by pack it up 500 over and I was it for the podcast why didn't you draw a perfect time cuz we can just talk you can say I think you ask me that we're on the road to do that's so much was I apologize I had no idea why you don't say it again you got like 15 seconds then your life bad words are used to be all ready for this or do you spend until there's like an 8 seconds away when you screw something up everybody in the room will know we all know what happened but everybody else once again I don't do science I talk sports that are I should I should say like shit and then as soon as they deep it just dropped look up Dallas Cowboys you're not. No you're not you're not going to do that we're going to talk about what you go on okay we're just going to make sure that we're all on the same thing with all four so I'm still going to be a dumbass on the show you get to enjoy me getting things wrong we're still going to have fuck you Tyler so if you guys like that segment we're going to have that that's okay you guys can go right it's fine it's totally fine about getting me really excited about is that she knows so much more about sports than I do the most people do in hockey in particular was such a big request and Mia is she's the expert she knows everything hockey so I'm excited to have her on for that knowledge and I'm so excited for you guys to get to know me as she is wonderful she knows so much about sports and I'm trying to help us out right now like my least favorite person already like you haven't even started the show you get on my nerves all the time she know so much I can't wait for you to get to know her so why did you get in the hockey I grew up in Maryland Northeast hockey weather for Maryland stickers Flyers hockey and Lacrosse are the two biggest Sports up there I would say and capitals man everybody's but I grew up in Texas and I like hockey out of the blue for you yes the capitals that's the shirt that Pete Hines was wearing when he came out to introduce Fallout 76 that's the sports team that registering with you at all like sports podcasts in the answer is yes I got a whiskey and Coke for in the World Cup England what is a bring it home or bring her home that was coming home invented football coming home to England win football now actually might be coming home that's the amazing part about it you're not done well the past couple of World Cup can I take off Wednesday so I can watch England lose to look up What They Call Madras plan I would not be surprised to see your Croatia offset of eating what is the big upset so far like for the host country in Russia to beat Spain I mean Russia was the lowest-ranked team coming into the World Cup obviously you know they had no business being where they were into beat Spain I mean Spain who was the favorite coming into the sink I don't know if it's unpatriotic or patriotic that I was rooting for Russia to win it was weird when you push it I got silent of there maybe I should have said in his goalie so fucking intimidating he plays hockey and whenever he plays the opposing team is not allowed to check take out take a puck from him like Donald he's like no one is allowed to take a pug from him while he has it and no one doesn't like the goalie is not allowed to block any of his shot so the score end up being like 27 into .5 like to know the greatest thing who never dead sports-wise is Robert Kraft owner for the Patriots and so he had one of these rings on when you met her and they mean like a nice presidential hallway or whatever Putin is flanked by all his bodyguard and Putin says can I look at the ring so he gives him the ring to look at in Putin takes looks at it and it puts it on his finger and then just disappears behind his bodyguards it just takes it and steals it is never going to do is say no. Give me that back or go after it that's amazing never seen one in person they are individual player have to pay for it as a team by it customized for like like goes in like the sides what it's going to look like in the placement of the diamonds and the amount you call into the big fingers why do pigs in your sister like six more if your mom and Barb center of the back perfect sculpt out my hitter you're probably the highest batting average for a guest across anything we've ever done a tragedy that you show up on the show we get wait we were going to go see it yourself right James Buckley that got to the World Cup final July 16th we are going to be airing right after this program Sports Mall is going to come on right after the RT Podcast every single Monday is off for the first season is it going to be like it is going to be taped yes quick turnaround on the show so thanks for coming out so the biggest thing though I was really trying to get rid of them so the biggest change that is coming actually was sports sports bar which is really exciting is you'll notice that we are calling this was sportsbal Network so sportsbal is going to have its own channel is going to live it is also going to be on the Ritchie site it is not going to be a first member so if you just want to watch a show you watch it on the RT site you can watch it on YouTube you'll know it was sportsbal Network the only show that we're going to have on that channel so a lot of you were asking you know is the OG crew going to be back in and what about Jack what about Jeff what about you what about Barbara lot of those other guys just every sports fan is wondering where Barbara Ann they're going to be coming back and what capacity are you guys going to have to go pay it and see what are you laughing at I know I made you laugh you got me in trouble today that's another it will talk about some other time yes although there's going to be other shows coming out for this Fitness shark or exercise ball sportsbal is coming back because you all ask for just coming back coming back on Monday we should show up as for these guys Tyler good to see you you don't get Skype yet I do not got it I do want to remind everyone this episode receive podcast is brought to you by quip the truth is most of us are brushing our teeth wrong for not long enough and we forget to change our brush on time focus on selling flashy gimmicks Robin you can better brushing but not quit what makes it so different for starters quip is an electric toothbrush that's a fraction of the cost of the both of your precious still packing just the right amount of vibrations to help clean your teeth with built-in timer helps you clean for the dentist recommended two minutes with guiding pulses that remind you went to switch sides next their subscription plans are for your help not just convenience they delivering your brush heads on a dentist recommended schedule every 3 months for just $5 including free shipping worldwide also comes with a mount that suctions right to me randone sticks to use as a cover for hygienic travel whenever you take your teeth start to just $25 and if you go to get quit.com Rooster Teeth right now to get your first refill hack free with a quip electric toothbrush at your first refill pack free at getquip.com RoosterTeeth that's getquip. Com RoosterTeeth thank you quit for sponsoring this episode of The Rooster Teeth podcast who is that I was working on my technique that you guys. I got asked over the weekend someone asked me if I needed a sugar baby it's like our offer from them it was an offer from them to be my sugar baby I'll eat stranger a complete stranger so when I've never seen in my life before I was driving down burn it and I saw 7-Eleven and I thought I could really use a Coke right now so I was like I'm going to go get a soda and I start pulling up to the parking lot and there's a car with like a bunch of women getting out of it and I think I don't want to park next to them cuz I don't like getting out there the people I leave a space and I parking in the next face and I get out of my car and if I walk him in 7-Eleven and I see if they're all getting out of the car all employees their democracy dealership change or something and I start walking into the end of the convenience store and one of the women looks at me she goes are you a doctor or something nope I keep trying to walk into the store so what are you do oh and have you ever wondered what would happen if your vagina was in a different place because that's what I do for a living so comedy have a lot of money and like nice well I ordered the car 2 years ago so I've had advance notice for it and she goes yeah yeah Julia front sugar baby or anything I like no I don't totally okay anyway see you later take care see you later I'm working right now she worked at 7-Eleven like I know she works until but she followed me into like my coat and then she's worked at the register your wallet was just looking in the picture. I walked out cuz I can never go back to that store again that's what I do if I were you in that position and she at like the first thing she does is ask you what you do if I were you I would have been like I'm a sugar baby gosh that right there now I know for future reference what you were right in that with I can go back to the store and ask her does that matter politically correct I don't know what your type is so I have a funny you say when she walked in with you I don't want to God damn it so my shoulder bugs me a little bit and I go on a fairly regular basis I go and have my shoulder worked on it go to a massage therapist and I get a massage massage my shoulder so I haven't gone in a while haven't gone in like 2 months is going regularly and something happen where I I did a thing where like I had an appointment then forgot I had an appointment did it shut off and I didn't go because I miss the appointment I was like embarrassed so didn't go back at all for like 2 months finally went back called and I was on my phone in my car I called it I called the place it's just like this club like it's going to be 40 bucks a month and they give you one massager month and relaxation I said I'm working on my shoulders I need you deep tissue until he said okay we have this person this person this person and we laughed about you freaked out that I have a male masseuse I'm surprised I'll be honest really why, because they can usually they're stronger no Vents and they can get in deeper and tomorrow so now I really know what to tell her I'm going to start driving again cuz I missed the last one so I go hey Siri massage appointment tomorrow at 3 with Larry and she goes okay tomorrow massage appointment with Larry you want me to schedule it I said yeah confirm she was okay about an hour later Larry herb Major Nelson from Xbox Live calls me or emails me and he says Hey Bernie I got this request for an appointment tomorrow I have a lot of conflicts the bad boy I wanted to die meteor was going to hit me just killed off and he was Egypt gatito he's very nice gracious guy ultimate professional right and I was overly embarrassed about it and he was very like I don't know nobody that I look and thank God thank God I look and it just made the appointment as mr. up that's what it was caucus of the Syrian it like didn't understand at least it sounds like a story had a happy ending I was mortified you absolutely mortified by that that's such a dangerous feature what happened to Richard Pryor that would have been hard to explain to my dad wants you to give him a massage or give you a massage in my contacts it probably would ask me to confirm which one when we could I just have him I'm just confused why you had to specify that it was like I'll need to think about that rotisserie knows when you go to the place I could be meeting with a reminder so how is this furnace you are he was great how's the shoulder feeling I feel like it feels better as soon as you get out of there and then just hold so it's just like kind of like dried out after a while and then it still don't creaky and everything like that would be hydrated shoulder that thing where was Gus you have this like when you stand up something on your body's going to pop some joint is going to pop my left leg and my left knee I do I just like every time I got from the couch so when did that start it's just involuntary reflex is that something that happens to everyone or am I sitting on planes I feel like the the cushioning is so thin and my ass is so bony the weirdest part and I think I talked about this before and ladies if you've had this before one part of your vagina goes numb wait but it's like only half of it it's never the full side to side or front to back it's usually you just like like one of the lip haha what is lb a ton off as a guy if you if you would just tell them down there and one-sided had a stroke 500 Rooster Teeth podcast podcast 500 of these nights and over the course of 500 podcast lot of things a couple different times but 30 days non-stop of podcast the number for three and a half days it's basically March almost we should start a podcast challenge at see if anybody can listen to all 500 episodes about sleeping back to back to back to back that's literally impossible challenge my authority podcast challenge we don't bring Ezra on a little bit later but never been shut down by legal that you absolutely can't do this was for day 5 season 2 I wanted to have a contest with two people in the community to see if they could stay awake with medical supervision for 5 days and legal was like there's no fucking way you're going to do that I was proving that like the research we did 4 day 5 there was a kid in the 60s who stayed awake but for 11 days he's a reference in the show that's it shows yeah I know you will kill someone you decide that you good that we should try the waiver that's a good idea I mean you make me sign up all the time than I thought it would be a great idea if we look back over those 500 episodes and we choose three different moments for each of us so each of us tonight get a clarification you can clarify some point that you made over the course of all these episodes that you didn't come across correctly on and you thought later oh I should have said this or I should have said that clarify one thing you can have your I was right moment the moment that you were proven right sometime the last nine and a half years and then we're going to give each of us a retraction that we all had bad moments on the podcast we're going to choose the moment and we can just say that moment didn't happen it is retracted and we will never mention it again. Like us and the audience shirt dad Dollar on the hook to good luck with that all right so be thinking about that one of the most popular things we've done over the last five hundred episode they're going to be so disappointed when it rain the rest of the show the clip show are we counting that one that's one of my favorite things we've done over the last 500 episodes is we have played a game in which we have pitted young Gavin Free against the Juggernaut search engine known as google.com in a game we like to call Gavin or Google Play Gavin or Google which one that was really loud if you have never played Gavin or Google before the way to play the game is I take a 224 word phrase and I type it into the search engine Google and I find the most ridiculous autocomplete based on searches that people have made using that term I've been take that same two to four word phrase I give the Gavin Free and we try to figure out who said it Gavin or Google are you ready to play Santa Barbara I know but that doesn't count this this takes the first 500 podcast throws around the whole trophy okay it's hard to figure out which one to read first alright which one said this Gavin or Google why does a dog having sex with your leg not break the law but if you jerk the dog off it does can I get a repeat on that into Google why does a dog why does a dog what's a dog like my mother dog the people next door so either dad or Googl said why does the dog having sex with your leg not break the law but jerking off the dust does jerking off a dog break the law hey Eric next week we need a dog for the podcast vagina beer why does a dog eat it's own throw up what do you want Barbara do you want to go first one was Gavin and which one is Google I'm going to say I'm going to see the what the fuck I'm going to say to the jerking off one is Gavin Gavin Barbara dunkelman get the point that was Gavin explain explain I mean it's the same outcome like one of them's illegal the results of the same active in one is passive though I can't believe that there would be a lot about that I thought we lived in like small government state look I don't I don't need them regulate in my life but you don't even know how you would jack off a dog do you help it get to Red Rock it or do you help it once red rocket achieve I'd like to have a dog I don't really know how any of that works for a retraction whenever you want it I'm curious that's all I'm just saying what everyone's thinking and here's what I'm learning he's at the end result is the same I'm learning that Gavin has had dogs hump his leg to completion I've never had that I seen if you don't kick him off that's what they do don't finish yet. They finish I don't know Gavin sleeves you don't have to answer that you don't have to answer that normal you'll even get like a joke and raise it wasn't I think it was a time I'm not sure what was the difference when you jumped off the dog I got to find out if Family Show alright so Barbara has one point Gus has the big goose egg next thing I entered into was 10 people can people... When asked can people produce any other liquids while lactating orange juice I sure they're wrong can people produce any other drinks while lactating drinks that significantly changes a huge difference and the other one was slightly more simple can people get fleas please I don't know like a question of course please when do you have fleas did you recover. And that's why there's a law since you're behind which was Gavin which one was Google I think the lactating one was Gavin I was going to say the same thing because of specifically the word drinks I guess I went back and reread it and drinks drinks I absolutely know that Gavin so you did the score is not going to change your Barber so you believe by Point what what it was you eat your point that was Gavin can a human ever make any other drink and then something else gets added to it to make it milk here I don't know what you think about that a woman's breast is like a compartment of powdered milk and a compartment of water together in the nipple at the last second at some point it's just right in the body makes it milk is it it must be I don't think that's the way it works is enough I was thinking maybe one day we'll just come out possibly I don't think that's possible alright we will learn a lot we just got back and I'll get back to it. You just texted me something here though she said you should retract that I was right that's why I was right moment all right last question unless you guys have a Time gotta show me stupid one inch at Grandview says that cause sweat Gavin salt water in the temple salt water to differ alright let's you at this is did we go did we go did we go one what are the groups fast did we go to war last night what are horrible world we live in Villa rest did we go to the moon when it was full I mean I could kind of see the logic behind that I could phase of the moon do we see on Earth if I could we looked in the telescope and seen them yet question that's interesting one who has to go first I'm going to let Emily you go first cuz you're behind first that way she can choose your answering your first official game what I do this is the process for Gavin or Google I listen to both answers in Gavin's voice to last night accurate accurate the moon was waxing crescent when we landed on it for the first time what's waxing where you see that tiny little sliver it's on the right side. I'm going to say the did we go to war last night with Gavin I'm going to say the moon one was Gavin just to mix it up here I can see why on the other guy said that I felt like at the classic Gavin misdirect where you look at the question on its surface and it seems absolutely stupid but there is a rationale behind it I was thinking if it was full do you have a tiebreaker question allowed to the dog what what time is it on the moon when they landed why don't you know these things it has to be night cuz the moon is out think about it always night of the Moon they had no moon light to light the way either so this is Pitch Black all right we have the tiebreaker XO just going to tie breaker Barbara I hope you're okay with this you guys have to choose a different answer and I'm going to allow Gus to go first because he has the most appearances on the podcast and has done a effectively mediocre job over the course of 500 episodes of producing the podcast app is this the show we've done with the most episodes it is right yeah probably it's probably in your sights for mediocrity that's the secret to longevity it's a real word and I just fucked it up but I'm going to I'm going to stand by it you can get cancelled on the internet how much are Tyler even if even if Mia Khalifa comes out, Google the Praises how much how much how much house is too much house how much house is too much house how much is a human body worth if sold by parts how much is the human body worth if sold in parts I do like that they whoever submitted that whether it's Gavin or somebody on Google knows how much the body's worth on it just want to break down all right Gus you get to go first no pressure lots of pressure are you feeling pressure feel a lot of pressure there's pressure I'm going to go with how would a body parts is Gavin and God I was going to go to houses Gavin how much house is too much house you were just headed anyway yeah LazyTown in your Champion is mr. Gus sorola wow photos of metal thank you. That is the whole game right there just terrible by the way and white hoods on me tell when we eat that was actually part of the part of the left was we were talking about the dunce cap and we got into the debate of whether or not a dunce cap was ever actually used over we just something to somebody at some point made up and we look up photos and you're right it does look like they're training early Clansman cuz they're all like photos from the 20s and their little kids are they white to the only way kids to go to school back then I don't know it's a long time ago why is this I need some country y'all live here too I felt like I was wondering if it was just like a cartoon thing there was a real thing that actually happened when you know I looked it up and you can find like historic photos of children in classroom wear dunce cap that was really a thing could you imagine doing that to a kid today you put them in the corner and put a dummy hat on them when I was in 2nd grade if our teacher caught you chewing gum she would make you put it on your nose for the rest of the day and if she caught you talking in class when you were supposed to be talking she would duct tape your mouth shut when my classmates go to the bathroom and we're in the second grade so she sends the corner cuz he was complaining too much and he shot himself in the corner I don't know yeah yeah it's much easier to learn nowadays next to the internet and I want to remind her when this episode of the receipt podcast is also brought to you by U2 me you to me is the largest and most accessible online learning marketplace with the most courses teachers and opportunities for students everywhere around the globe with over 65,000 courses udemy is the largest bass for online learning I just start taking a photo shop class today I decided that I'm done being terrible at Photoshop I saw they had one so I'm going to get to it we'll see maybe I'll make something I'll see if I can make something up when I'm done we have something for everyone and you can access new knowledge wherever you are on your phone tablet or computer are you guys to check out you to me that help students all over the world improve their skills their careers and their lives and they help us set up this exclusive offer for our audience you would a u d e John NY / RT right now get 90% off when you sign up for classes will not find a better price to sign up for classes Now using leak u d e m y r t l y changing classes for 90% off make sure you download their app for your phone so you can stream your studies wherever you are that's u d e. M y r t u d e. M y r t thank you to me for sponsoring this episode of The Rooster Teeth podcast thank you I'm going to I'm going to walk up to the bar I'm going to go to bed you need to have typing on there I still can't type you still can't talk honey Chan in my phone I realize I don't use my pinky to type it all I just kind of hold it out awkwardly like it's trying to escape the rest of my fingers did you take a typing class so you guys just taught yourself how to type thing you learned a language by counting the number of words I mean it's like how does that help learn typing is a skill cuz I have 10 that's what I'm saying yeah but see I mean I have 10 fingers that's a whole thing you could do it yourself really doing it for two fingers holding that microphone right now you're nailing it Origins pick up the damn microphone because that's instinct definition of weird thing people learn how to type it's a thing that people actually did you take a typing class took a typing class raise your hand if your under the age of 50 and you took a typing class I fell apart everyone else who didn't raise their hand right but you can still type right everyone can type it's a waste of time the end the end if you think about it you end up well we need more time if you can type quickly over the course of your life because you get through your typing a lot more alright teach me something from your typing class typing it's not that you practice in repetition yeah but I'm sure I can still type faster than you type off I will destroy you are we going to do the type up before or after the office suck off but we have yet to do so I can tear it up well congratulations Gus I am over here trying to think of something that would be more boring that a typing contest and I literally can't think of it five hundred episode 3 also hate looking over and seeing you in that metal I don't know why it feels like we just had a spelling bee or something or math camp stove everything you do you took a class not everything Gavin it's a normal thing to learn to type is it did you did you learn how to write them how to do that so I just told her that so you've already passed the first day of class for the teacher the letters you're with your way I had do you know the numbers to cuz that today too break coming from the guy who doesn't want to use 24 hours because it is to what it's too hot to do Max it's too hot to add 12 to a number and this is that's it that's why today I'm in your country and we're talking about how it's left hand drive but I was out with somebody who went from Ireland to Northern Ireland and the only way they knew that they had changed countries they were expecting like a checkpoint or something like that but the only way they knew they had changed countries what they went from kilometers in Ireland to miles in miles per hour in the UK so you guys just choose whatever you want basically hours in the UK I didn't know that either yeah I thought they would have been kilometers to resign because of brexit Theresa May's brexit outline was not hard enough for a soft brexit not a hard drive for 3 minutes that resigned in protest over that stuff do you like I like I like my brexit over easy I like a full English breakfast so you get along with Boris Johnson then do you like a deep tissue leaving the EU 22 your first clarification or attraction or slow down if you tell you I got mine I know I'm all over it at two or three well show me to clarify yours take if I could do it too I would have said I wasn't pooping in the room windows taking showers when I pee and you make a game and you break the rules the story that became an RGA where we were at Michael and Lindsay's wedding and I convinced Monty that he could Cut the Cake while they were out taking pictures and then Monte when he's like I'm so hungry and I said for money that's why the cake is sitting out right there so I just go get yourself he's got yeah but nobody else's got any cake at ago and of course when you started walking I like just hung back like oh my God and he got a knife and she knows why he was like what clarify Monte Cut the Cake actually I would have just seen how close Monte was going to come to actually tell him to take that how fast he could have shot that with a knife anime eyes I would click to clarify I would not have let Monty Cut the Cake and Michael and Lindsay wedding I swear I would not have you were very offended that I don't have a clarification but I haven't I was right moment shocking the iPhone 4S came out with only one model that's not true you're making model there was only one 4S what you can't buy fucking butter in one stick you add solutely can women looking for a year-and-a-half and nobody's found in people tweeted to you all the time also tweeted normal butter no no I was right hey hey guess what I was right about that that's the rules it's going to kill me a raise this from history right I never said headlight fluid property of a retraction I don't know if I could talk that one I have I have a serious retraction it's something that's been bothering me for literally 5 and 1/2 years you all know what it is on what is like the first year I was on the RT Podcast I was very nervous all the time and I would say a lot of really really stupid incompetent shit and one of the things I talked about was Twitter and how people I don't understand why people who don't have a lot of followers tweets I explained that so badly and I just want to retract that from history Forever and Always and no one is ever allowed to record my conversation ever again cuz I was a fucking idiot deleted from the internet just want to say I would not have molested the kid I really I would like to retract that statement that I was going to go into the public bathroom in the less the kid that was just a joke I want I want to rock that wherever I want to retract the discussion about airplanes on treadmills like I don't ever want to talk about an airplane on a treadmill ever again I have a guy was right moment it is perfectly fucking normal to pee in the shower it is apparently Barbers right in 2012 we went to a movie premiere and we were brushed by Donald Trump we were as we walked in and write off that happened I said some things about Donald Trump I said that he just makes it up and he lies all the time I was right alright any clarifications or anything like that I think I speak very clearly going to clarify anything there was also two iPhones I just want to be sure there were not to iPhone 4S if you were talking about the 4S I was right there was too I'm giving you better you better give me this one hi reply reply all right mr. Ezra cooperstei natural want to come on out azra is the president of RoosterTeeth yo does it here just so you know what are the dimension of the podcast of while ago we haven't talked about it since you said you and you and Matt have been talking about doing it up like for first members you like a behind the scenes of business things you were in the log I did it was all about like what Richard he was like as a business and people just love that blog and I just want to see more of that stuff that make money I've been trying to figure that out. YouTube do we have enough time yeah I mean it's something that I'm passionate about I know Matt is too but you know RoosterTeeth has such a Vibrant Community and it's really important I think for us to like demystify what his business is and so how can you pull back the curtain a little bit how can we talk about some of the things that we do that our business is yours but impact every single person who enjoys and loves RoosterTeeth he's been with us for years and years and years how can we explain a little bit deeper what decision making is how it impacts the business and ultimately how it impacts the community and I think that's why I think it's an important one for us to do and make leaf on there. I heard that it gets a high hit rate so it's something that you know that were Matt and I are going to die soon and I'm pretty excited about a lot of trepidation I think if you were like oh shit they can return the pic for your all the ways that this could go wrong but really going back to 2011 thinking about the way the world was kind of changing around us for a lot of times because we felt like we were kind of operating in plain sight as a company and nobody was really paying attention to us and be like we just kind of had our business model like white out in the open but everyone else is doing all this weird stuff you know like going all-in on YouTube or no building their whole presence on Facebook and stuff like that and when everyone really started to discover the digital video online World in Netflix was like a big push in that direction and tell me you know we were a huge part of the first chapter of online video is an industry want to be make sure we are work for the next chapter and so we realize you're going to have to go out and get some investment like a traditional business we're going to have to go do that and when you do things were going to happen when we did that we knew that the moment we have a single dollar people were going to ask us to go out and start an MC in which that was a big thing of time you don't you know I need a big one like fifty thousand different channels and I will also knew that you would ask is to find a management company and so you know that whole process and then we met Ezra and George the CEO of full-screen Edward was the president of full-screen of time. If we could hire two guys like this if we could manage to make that happen these are the kind of guys that we would want to find so just made sense for us to do that deal with Wills dream because you already had them see and it was a bit is 80000 Channel partners we were like let's not do that because that's what we already know how to do when going back to Hawaii for us a table you know what you guys were doing something and had something that was so intrinsically valuable so cool so it's so different so let me know it was you know we realized was actually quite easy to build like what RoosterTeeth was was something that was like super hard to build it was like really amazing content and this huge Global community of people that loved it and like that was exciting for us so for us we didn't need you to build the MCN yeah and then I was being the President Wilson was working on a regular basis and she said one day it's like I just like what you guys are doing we had a long talk about it now as her became the president Rooster Teeth and has moved from La moved his whole family now he lives in Austin Texas with us every single day of the week so I saw him what's a common in chat some wanted to ask you a question I'm looking at the chat here on the livestream and I was all good 93 asked did full screen virus he's just so you get a job here by the company in some ways actually I we bought recipe so I can be on the Rooster Teeth podcast so this is all worked out for me know it's funny because I've been involved with since I became president but really for the last over 3 years for the first couple years every single we can fly back and forth between LA and Austin and then moved out here full time in November of this of last year but you know when you join Rooster Teeth there's kind of Miss like the undercurrent of like people say you like you know how you should not try to be on shows in like don't be like you know that's kind of like a thing that you don't want to necessarily do yeah I was like okay I clean out the L stand in the business side of this thing so it's it's actually really fun to finally like to step out of the shadows and you know I'm no longer be part of the business I'm just going to be like full Talent so let's do this thing I was actually kind of the negative stuff that we do in full screen sometimes not the case in a lot of lot of places like after you get through this for like I'm sure you'll correct me and say you're not fully responsible these but I give you full credit for the double door locks like that was an idea that came about cuz more valuable for people to be top-level subscribers and then you were also the person behind the lifestyle shirts the barber shirts to the Jeff shirts like you really wanted to do that you like it was amazing watching you interact with Jeff hey Jeff I like that shirt you're wearing is that a rooster t-shirt he's like no no it's just like you know whatever website is from I like it and it's just a white and black shirt on like that should be a rooster t-shirt let's let's just go do that and he was like you know looking at me and how to look did him and I kind of stared a little deeper at him in a little deeper and a little deeper into his soul and he's like yeah we should probably do that that's kind of how the whole like Jeff line things dark outside I need like we would never do that like you would never previously we wouldn't have like going to Jeff and say hey we're going to make a lot of shirts ready to call to Jeff shirts he's like no I like they like your style and I like what you're doing hit the right point in like that Jeffy going to be like today like Michael Jordan has his own brand of speakers everything is so creative and so smart and that's a lot of it's like a lot of things that I've been able to feel really great things to do once once I was able to serve Dive In clean the rooster teeth you know it's you guys had such a great business and such a great foundation and so many great talented people there was really like kid in a candy store when I came over here because it was like okay now we can go do more content we can hire people that fit our culture but can help us move faster we can go do all these new things we can create more content you know it was all things that you know that we were able to help and power and then you know who is continue to grow and I'm very proud of what we've all accomplished in the last several years and nuts pretty crazy I can't believe it's going to be 4 years coming up later this year that that that happened yeah I like that you know the process of acquiring a company is like you do this whole meet and greet in like a dating thing and you know you're like learning about the company and they give you like a big pitch book and like Matt and Bernie like you know consoling like these all these slide presentation and whole time your head you're kind of like did you have to have this like skepticism you're like really that good you know what I mean like is this is good as it gets this is this what inning with RoosterTeeth it's one of these companies where ever you know that I think that it's better and better you know it's better than what I could ever imagine it maybe cuz you guys are really come so genuine in like so like truthful and that the way be represented the business without using PowerPoint I think about that are driving or Googl Style late as what's my dad looks just like the language of business it's like you know who's your favorite person I mean to be totally honest like Matt is a genius like he's amazing he is a talented team but I'm so mad at the top of like to like you even an online video as long as it's been around for a long time and you know it's here I found out we were talking back stage and I found an old interview that Ezra did over 8 years ago and I said you know when we knew you were coming out of the podcast I wanted to look up an old interview you are done and see how good you felt about the answers and you sat there and you would look at my laptop and you read it and you that's all right I would still and it's amazing that you still a long time still have that same vision in that same focus and yesterday but no goals and your answer was running a media company that changes the landscape in some way and eventually taken that knowledge and power to do social good and I feel like I like I think we had me where do some crazy stuff is a company like don't get me wrong I think that like like but I think the long-term like the impact the rooster teeth can have is important and you know we do extra life is incredible thing that we do every single year but I think in the long term like Rooster Teeth and have a way more profound impact on like culture and Society think I'm speaking in very high level terms but I mean yeah I think we can get there I hope so daily basis working really closely I think it is kind of a weird business like this I'm going to a conversation you know what the community and culture and Harley shows it's kind of a hard thing to explain even if people are seeing it in action and that's just the one guy felt like we saw it the first time as I can I get with this is you know I guess what this is and I get where this is going and what you guys want to turn it into and I want to I want to be part of that the companies that are above us in every single day there like you know we want to find more Rooster Teeth like we want to go acquire more Rooster Teeth and it's like good luck finding them they're so rare right it's not like it's not like there's just like I mean there's a whole story behind it but it's such a rare thing that what we have and so important and so cool that like we have this community that were connected content we know that we love that they want to watch and it you know there's this whole symbiotic relationship it is truly super super special and you know we're just at it and I think we're only the beginning of what they can ultimately become and that's that's what I love every today is like pushing all the people in the company to like think bigger you know cuz it's like sometimes you get in a cycle of like we can only do so much we can only go so big and like you know what can we do if it's beyond what we think we can do every single day it's hard not to be excited about genlock yeah it's really I mean it's I'm excited about that we announce that we're doing more of that is like you constantly like almost announcing things but yeah I like the way we're all in this together fucking leave me out to dry like that fuck y'all are so someone podcast in downtown Austin and we got a live audience since you know we we couldn't put the tickets up for free because then people from all over the world or just take them and then we'd end up with an empty theater so we tried we have to put a low dollar value on it so we said you know what will put tickets on for five bucks and if you show up will give you a drink tickets and get a free drink that way it's not like a total rip-off and I saw someone to be announced that complaining like oh typical RoosterTeeth cash grab do you know how much money it cost to put Pistons haha maybe 250 baby 300 people so he's not rolling it but this is just like I'm disappointed that someone would think that we would take like an easy cash grab like that and I think that that is the load of Thor come out it takes to make something profitable but I don't I'll be the first topic of the business podcast with other than that and I think it really gives the podcast different good sitting here and I'm listening to everyone's laugh at all of my job I don't like once we have heard if there was never a we need to stop or we need to take a break I don't know why I genuinely look forward to every week old like the time flip podcast 350 350 thought about doing it for 300 missed it for 400 400 so far in the future images of arid a super old podcasts on the old set from the Republic even though we were in Stage 5 by then it was like before Michael got married to Lindsey it's so he like put on that podcast but he had to put on a fake wedding ring because by that time he would have been married already one that was kind of historical but we didn't know it but Michael was smelling the dead mouse that was stuck in the speaker and I reference that was kicking up a fuss about it but I didn't realize that was the one that we were going to put out for like 18 months I've came out way before he that has that long between production and release is really slow mo guys cuz there's some stuff you record that's what's the longest you've gone between recording something and putting it out two and a half years probably for some stuff you just have that thing where you know it's time to put that video out the biggest Gap was for the trailer we didn't even host the video I shot a hard drive moving in slow motion but I thought I was like looking at other stuff is going viral the time is because I think there's a lot of people have seen inside of hard drive so I just uploaded it without that like I'm not in it done snowing it I just put it up I like 5 million views like that the whole time is it that's where the biggest Gap Dan's uvula wait I mean his uvulas been in every video so far and they haven't kicked up a fuss. I just acquired Stephen it's a cock and balls is what that is unstoppables are in every video when they demonetize a video Even after like 4 or 5 years that it affects you write me and it's it's more funny really just want to point out that they're just like shut itself off but I look like a vagina and the Giants are you seeing demonetized and yeah because your eyes and imagine hard enough it could be call me Dan, it was intense it's his mouth thank you for coming on at who's going to RTX Austin yes do that it would be so much for being such a great we have so much stuff that's in the Lake Club surrounding the event at night and everything like that are you going to take part in Matt's panel this year will you guys sometimes I go in like moderately got in the audience they go get an answer Smiley right yeah I know it's there so much cool stuff is here. I'm super excited and the nighttime program it is like non-stop it's it's crazy I get every like there's three things every like every night that I want to be doing it so give me super cool you're going to RTX look for as easy to spot goby the big shaved head that's like 2 feet above everybody else yeah and if you were if you are going to RTX awesome on the panel that would definitely recommend if you're parked over Chief an indoor created your creator yourself go to Matt's ask the CEO panel cuz we have that at every single RTX Matt you doing it this year he's doing it Matt you're my favorite too just so you know so azra doesn't get in the way of our love you're my favorite I like you more than Bernie and Ezra combined finally works well guys 500 podcast podcast it's a lot of podcast pretty much every week and just have a conversation and just catch up with you guys and it just feels like you know it never gets old to me after with whole conversation throughout the week is a ghost things I want to tell you I don't like no I can't I have to wait like I couldn't I didn't let you all know I didn't text you in a sugar baby thing happened to wait till Monday and then we'll talk about it before the podcast for the podcast over to the podcast or you or you're getting a lot more but I think that in addition to the Jeff and Barbara line of clothing we should have a gas line that's just stay at home comfortable clothes it's just like pajamas and house slippers sweatpants right like fuck you I'm not going outside. Do you know the whole line of clothing for you but it's a tie social clothing it's like bomb-squad stand 500 feet back like that or service dog do not pet are those hoodies that zip all the way up to the hood white Hood dunce. It was like sleeping pods where you can isolate yourself from everybody else I love it g sorola Barbers like the only person who was smart and I'm still late still very late to the game only had a picture of his knee for like the first four years I tease myself in what's an easy way in you like food you got dogs love you on that mostly food and travel stuff picture of a plane Wing through a window at the beach the beach for air 500 it's like the beach for ass who was the regular Beach like for what liquid what's the beach for a solid lava volcano damn did not answer damn shut me down with that one person yesterday to follow Chrissy Teigen weather what's going on with the what's the what's the story there, there's drama oh she posted a photo of herself breastfeeding and people didn't like that it's it's always something who knows it's a stupid world we live in it wasn't a dog don't worry there was no sexual gratification going on or the of the dog the US pressured a bunch of different countries to abandon a UN resolution to just promote breast-feeding or they was World Health Organization paid by formula companies to because the language of the bill restricted certain types of advertising for formula in favor of promoting breastfeed so there was some what's the name to the formula companies are saying they didn't want the restrictions on there I don't know but yeah we should be the measures that they were taking you know threatening sanctions against countries in the end you know Russia has to introduce the Detroit if the place to be I mean what would you do time does always apparently in media just like okay with the entirety of America just immigration over that then are in the entire country of Canada so we're a little sparse up there pretty soon for future investment how much is Tundra about cheaper about 350 resources not it though using the civilization model it doesn't have anything to grow weed is it about cold cuz it was but I think it's about cold I think it's like a level of permafrost that's a thing, Frost permafrost I don't know we'll we'll have to we'll have to buy some Tundra I would get an acre of tundra because it's this only coming up because the context have the tundra one of our special guest on the podcast Joel Heyman come on a regular basis and he would talk about gold and I've been getting these long discussions with Joel about gold collapses gold is going to be all this it has no value like in a post-apocalyptic Society it's just another thing that people say this is valuable because no it's gold value is something that people have signed something you can't eat gold your family is starving it's like gold is just a currency just like you can suck it if you tried hard enough the saying it's raining in sandwiches in pussy from now on in an effort to prove Joel wrong back all those years ago I bought Bitcoin as a joke and then I forgot that I bought Bitcoin for this joke until about last year that's the best joke I've ever told in my life I probably owe low Joel $19,000 yep yep did you get a handful what's that can you tell us how many Barbers badge purse with it but like I said I'm talking about like my stuff Daddy's that is fucking ridiculous maybe I'll maybe I'll see how much I'll let me think about it talk about it it's the reason why we can sell tickets for fun how to spell put it that way so thanks Joel for coming on the podcast and that month that's that's why I was right moment is wrong what it looks get the wrapping this up so and we'll see you guys again next week back at a normal time at 5 p.m. for episode 501 by